As regular readers will know, Becca is usually the ranty one. I tend to have a slightly longer fuse. But, to reference Family Guy, my gears are well and truly grinding. I’ve read one too many Oxford ‘restaurant review’ in the national media where the author spends the majority of the article whining on about how unhappy they were, many moons ago, while living and studying in Oxford.

It started quite calmly, with Giles Coren’s review of Turl Street Kitchen, in which Mr Coren tells us, over the course of about a dozen paragraphs, about his disinterest in coming to Oxford University and subsequently awful time here, before telling us in about half as many words that he actually liked TSK. Shortly afterwards came Giles’ review of The Oxford Kitchen, mostly focusing on how looooong it took to get his food. Now this one I get, I have kids too, an hour and a half sat in a restaurant waiting for food is beyond torturous for kids (and the accompanying adults). But, here again, little focus on the food – in fact I’m not even sure I know what he ate.

More recently my attention was drawn to Tanya Gold’s bizarre review of The Cherwell Boathouse, which, quite possibly, would have been better suited to a psychiatrist’s office. Though if you read a previous article, where Gold names Oxford University as the “gateway to hell”, you’d be tempted to believe she was warming to our wonderful city.

Sure, I can see it must be hard, studying at internationally renowned Oxford University. Fitting in somewhere new, all those lonely young souls. I can totally imagine how impossible it was to find anywhere to eat other than a kebab van at two in the morning, and how mentally scarring that may have been. But please, for the love of God, will you just tell us about the food? The dining experience? The customer service? Without self-indulgently blathering on about your tormented youth. We get it, you didn’t like living here. I really rather do though – and I’m starting to get more than a little bored of your moaning.

Oxford has its flaws, it certainly has its fair share of shoddy restaurants (you know who you are), but, it also has a selection of really fantastic restaurants – plus beautiful parks, stunning buildings, and some pretty awesome people – you just have to look a little further than the end of your upturned nose.

So, as an open request to all those national restaurant critics who may be visiting in the future – pleeeeaase, tell us about the restaurant, what you ate, what you thought of it, and by all means add a backstory… just go easy on the outdated and unecessary bashing, no one likes a bitter aftertaste.

Yours sincerely,
An Oxford Local